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The Reality of the Saying “Sticks and Stones” and How to Start Coping with the Truth

Picture this- a little girl on her first day of Kindergarten wearing her brand-new outfit with sandals that matched.  One of the first activities for the school day is carpet time.  While sitting on the carpet, a boy points to her foot where one of her toes has a mole on it and tells her she is gross.  So, the little girl decides right then and there that her feet are gross, and she is never going to let anyone see her toes again.  

That memory is burned into her brain causing her to be overly self-conscious to the point that as a teenager she convinces her mom to let her have it removed, well as best as the doctor could.  The skin in that area was so thin it was impossible to remove it completely, but it is less noticeable.  However, it is still there, that constant reminder of the hurtful words that shaped the girl’s perception of herself.  This same girl wants to fit in so badly that she is willing to do almost anything, including cutting people out of her life because her so-called “friends” decided for her who her friends should be.

Fast forward to adulthood where cutting remarks are a thing of the past, well almost.  A co-worker makes what she probably thinks is an innocent comment stating the woman’s friend has her beat in the hair department hands down.  Just like that, the woman is transported back to the carpet during circle time where a classmate is calling her gross.  Now the co-worker isn’t calling her gross by any measure; however, the six-year-old inside of her is trying to desperately believe that “Sticks and stones may break your bones, but words will never hurt you,” when the truth is that words, even spoken in complete innocence, can absolutely crush you and crush your spirit.  

I decided at that moment that I was going to stop trying to measure my self-worth by what others thought about me.  I wanted to shake things up!  The first step was to let go of the limiting beliefs and the old stories I had been telling myself.  I stopped letting it take up space in my world.  Each morning I wake up and list what I am grateful for and realize that I am extremely blessed.    

If this gives you are a starting point to begin to see your true self-worth, then hop on over to my free group- Drained to Fulfilled Mommas: Rediscovering Yourself and Finding your Joy